š²š½ Part ll - Malafama - One Year Later - 04.11.2026
The cult of one.
I have a bird painting commission sitting on my table needing attentionā¦ but I write more than I paint. I find if I tap things out I donāt need to continue to roll them around in my head. Itās good for the creative processesā¦ all of the processes. Clears the mindā¦
Iāve been wanting to return to Malafama for quite sometime. I think itās been about a yearā¦ itās expensiveā¦ and cash onlyā¦ but I like the music, the pool tables are great, good snacks, the waitstaff is attentive, they have UNO, and sometimes itās busy and sometimes not.
The last time I planned to go, which was recently, I asked Lorena. Pool and beers? For Saturday? And the day before, I received 500 texts, starting with āyou never take me anywhere.ā Didnāt I just ask you to go out for pool? And invited you to Escondido? She was on a terror with meā¦ sheās an emotional being. Wellā¦ 300 texts is my maxā¦ and now itās drama. And no... we didnāt make it to Malafama. And now Iām a bad person.
The time before thatā¦ my compaƱera was high and acting like a douchebag to meā¦ and I fully knew why. I already took her to dinner and drinksā¦ and now was not interested in taking her to play pool across the street, and pay for it, and having her continue to be weird. And when I confronted herā¦ and asked if she was on drugsā¦ she had a meltdown and screamed like a crazy person. If you have to lie about your lifeā¦ then maybe you should make some honest changes. Or own it at least. What you do is your businessā¦ but when your behavior is impacting the person you are withā¦ bullshit.
Look dudesā¦ I have/had my issues with drugs and alcohol. One time I showed up to a first date so high on opioids that I had my sweater on inside-out (true story). Eventually, the woman politely ended the date early. Rightfully soā¦ Andā¦ I thought there was no way she knewā¦ but thatās the deal. You are high and stupid. I was so out of itā¦ I thought my car was stolen in the morningā¦ but I just couldnāt remember where I had parked. It was disrespectful to her and embarrassing for me. We never spoke again.
I have way too many stories, spanning many years, relating to my abusesā¦ more than I want to admit or remember.
soā¦ if you claim you are clean and youāre notā¦ you are a lier and you have a problem. And if you offer transparency and continue to deceiveā¦ youāre a douchebag. And in the endā¦ you should just be aloneā¦ or get your shit together.
And that being saidā¦ I had found myself alone in a remote location in the farm lands of northern Colorado. A place called Keensburg. I spent 4-5 days detoxing. Getting cleanā¦ before I left for Ecuador. I had severely impacted another person and damaged that relationship. I deserved to be aloneā¦ and it is what I needed. Lots of time to think. I promised myself Iād never impact another in that way. I changed the relationship I had with myself. I took ownership, confronted demons, and got my shit togetherā¦ and sinceā¦ I have kept that promise. Itās a battleā¦ but it can be rewardingā¦ and itās possible. And I have a blessed life.
Anyways, I was going to bring Lauā¦ but she doesnāt dig on the gentrified scene and doesnāt like La Condesaā¦ or the foreigner population ā¦ even though Iām a gĆ¼eritoā¦ butā¦ I want to goā¦ and she likes snacksā¦ and the joint has good snacks. Soā¦ I have my Malafama dateā¦
We had a great time, micheladas, nachos, people watching, laughing, a little poolā¦ and my shirt was not inside-outā¦ and even if she was highā¦ I donāt careā¦ because she is good company and has been honest enough.
Iām slightly buzzedā¦ and now I need to pack my mochila for Valle de Bravo. I leave tomorrow morning at 10:30amā¦
The cult of oneā¦
š²š½š¶ļøš
